An Apostates Experience: Why I Declared My Apostasy

#AnApostatesExperience: Why I Declared My Apostasy

The other day, we at EXMNA made #AnApostatesExperience happen in response to Reza Aslan — who utterly missed the point.

He wasn’t the only Muslim responding. I got one Muslim who told me that I would’ve been better off taking off my headscarf rather than full-on coming out to my family as an atheist. This person is hardly alone. More than one Muslim has asked me why I didn’t tell my parents that I wanted to de-veil and stop practicing Islam rather than to declare to them that I had deconverted.

Given that I went from being a devout Muslim to being an atheist without detection but am a terrible liar, pussyfooting around my atheism would have been a pointless strategy.

Before I deconverted, I was a pious bookworm. It was hardly uncommon for me to respectfully teach my own parents things about religion. I followed every tenet as much as humanly possible. I was, for the most part, a biddable and obedient child. I earned mostly As in school, read lots of religious books, and strove to please my elders.

I started wearing hijab off and on at age eight and full-time at age ten. Though hijab isn’t required of pre-pubescent girls, I both wanted to become accustomed to wearing it and didn’t want to suddenly take it up full-time when I started my period. To my childish self, the idea that people might know via the signal of hijab that I had started my period was a deeply embarrassing thought.

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2 Comments on An Apostates Experience: Why I Declared My Apostasy

  1. Republikein // 16/10/2014 om 13:20 //

    Heet dat ook uit de kast?


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